paulosuello

2011-10-24T18:59:00.000+08:00

I was able to air out my sentiments on my relationship. I'm partly relieved. I don't know how he will react as of yet but I guess I have to face the consequences now. Haist its sad.

2011-10-24T12:30:00.000+08:00

I can't sleep and I was trying to air out my feelings in a medium that I know only very few people would be able to read. Right now I feel confused and sad. Confused because I don't know how to deal with my relationship. Sad because I learned that some friends are only there when they need you. I wish I could just unfollow and unfriend them in facebook or twitter.

I wish its that easy to let someone go when you know they need you. Its really difficult and depressing to know what to do but not have the courage to act on it. The price of happiness is too expensive. I just don't know what to do.

Lord, please help and guide me. I need to see what should be done or at least just let me be a spectator in my life just this time because I don't can't muster the courage to face this decision

2011-04-15T11:22:00.002+08:00

Just to scream this out of my heart

To start this is a free flowing message straight from my heart. I'm writing this just to realease that depressing thought that has been lingering in my head for days now. I have been feeling really low and useless for no reason at all. If you will look at my life you'll find that everything seems to be fine and the people around me are all very supportive.

I just don't know why I always feel that emptiness inside. I wish I can cry for a reason and for a good one. I want to fall in love again and go down on my knees and beg someone to give that love back. I noticed that my heart has grown really hard and it seems that I'm unattracted to almost everyone. Yes, I feel that sudden surge of libido at times but it always dies down.

I feel jealous because my friends found their partners already and I haven't. Am I ugly? hayyy???? what am i looking for? What do I want in my life? What will make me happy? I hope that I will find some answers in my sleep. I hope that God will show me the way and give me the courage to face whatever it is that I need to face. If I'm doomed to live my life alone then I have to deal with it. I just hate the feeling of waiting when there's no one to wait for.

2011-04-03T13:38:00.002+08:00

What will happen tonight???

Right now I'm busy washing my clothes and it's funny to hope that someone might come over and help me. hahaha! I really hate washing but I guess I have no choice. I need to do this. I just wish that I have someone to talk to while doing it to keep me preoccupied while waiting for the machine to finish. Otherwise I'll die early because I'm smoking to fill in the gaps.

Yesterday, my officemates and I went to REDBOX. I didn't find it fun. It was dragging and boring. I don't know why. It's not usually like that but it was. Maybe because Lei was not there. We miss Lei, he is a little distant recently, perhaps it was his illness that makes him gloomy. I pray that he will be better.

Later today, I will try to go to the church and then watch movie after. People were talking about Sarah Geronimo and Gerard Anderson. They say it's a great film so I'll try to catch it later...

Till next time!

2011-03-31T11:13:00.002+08:00

You can't have it all...

For awhile now I have been hoping that one day someone will come and sweep my heart away. Apparently, he must be sweeping someone else or caught up in traffic. I have tried searching on dating sites or even push my luck on random meet ups but it all failed. Well I guess because it was not my idea of love. Maybe because I still believe in serendipity.

My career now is at all time high, financially I'm good. My family has never been better. My friends are growing in numbers. BUT, that big BUT is that one thing that I wish will be added in my life.

I hope SOOOON... I'm getting tired and impatient... I'm losing hope at this one arena that I always fail... LOVE

2011-03-27T05:25:00.002+08:00

The truth about today...

I never thought that some ties can be so loose and empty yet still remains strong for quite a period of time. Today I met some old friends and I felt so distant. I could not even figure out why I was there after all. Perhaps it was my stubborn attitude wanting to rekindle that friendship and my eagerness to know if I managed to still have that popularity within the group. To my surprise, I'm still popular and well loved but the topic of discussion... was there a topic??? hahaha I guess if there was I missed it because it was not worth remembering.

Tonight was a realization that some yesterdays are better seen in pictures. I would have rather stayed in bed and browse some old photos online and reminisce because the good days indeed passed. We grew up and we grew apart. Sad fact of life.

After the stressful night I decided to unstressed myself, I went to Wesha and tried relax. Apparently, it was not relaxing at all. I did not know that they were cleaning the place so there was no sauna, no jaccuzzi and no food left. What a grand way to close the day right?

Yeah!

Bad day!

2011-01-24T16:59:00.003+08:00

When I see you again...

Why am I so stupid? I should have approached you when you were looking at me that night! I so hate myself for being such a coward! Now all I can think of is turn back time and go back to that Sunday night. I can still perfectly remember what you were wearing and how you applauded when I sang even if I barely hit the notes!

I hope you noticed that I tried to return the favor by applauding you when you sang on stage. Did you notice that?

At least I got your name Jay. I assumed it was Jay because when you stepped out with that girl you were with someone said, Bye Jay. I hope I will meet you again and if I do I will be brave this time around. I will not chicken out. Just please show me some sign again and I'll take careof the rest. hehehee!

You were wearing black long fashion sweater with black pants and shoes. Your eyes were round with long slender body. Exactly my type. Hayyy!!!

If I'll meet you again I will let yu read this pathetic note! DUHHH!!!

2010-11-01T04:33:00.003+08:00

Pest and Prey

Around 4am the dawn was about the break but the sun was hidden by the early morning sky. I could hear my stomach growling and I knew I have to feed myself before I decide to sleep. I put my shorts on and headed to the nearest store. I noticed that most stores are closed then I thought yeah-it was All Saints day, people are probably busy in the cemetery while I'm here at home just enjoying my regular weekday off.

It was drizzling outside and I didn't bother trudging my way without any umbrella. honestly, I didn't notice it. The last meal I ate was the late lunch I got from the fridge so I was pretty determined to satisfy my hunger.

I got myself some instant noodles and while on my way home, I saw a cat who seems to have something in his mouth. I only realized after getting a little closer that he caught a rat and toyed with it. He wasn't munching the dying rat but simply letting it suffer in his mouth to death. I was thinking, what a brutal way to die! Now the pest is the prey!

2010-04-13T06:53:00.007+08:00

Bright new day! It has been awhile since the last rainfall. Good thing today I woke up and it was drizzling outside. It's very refreshing!

My bestfriend uploaded our Galera pics in facebook and I enjoyed reminiscing the trip. I decided not to load the photos here to free some internet space. So if you want to check it you can add me in FB paulosuello@gmail.com and check Ryans album. I don't even want to load it again in my own FB. I thought that would be redundant. I'll upload my solo pose or those that I super like but the rest I'll leave it in Rye's folder.

@italian resto in Galera
Me, Rye, Anton

Just a thought: Friends are way better than lovers! I once tried to mix both but it didn't blend too well. Friends are friends and lovers are lovers, it can't be both. I guess it has something to do with the commitment.

It's time for breakfast everyone!

Enjoy your day!

2010-04-12T11:21:00.002+08:00

It's been awhile since I wrote something here. I was thinking what would be a perfect topic to discuss. This blog started as a movie blog then it evolved into a diary and then into a love story that ended into a documentary of my bitter life...

I would like to change that

Starting today, I will document the great events in my life. Things that I would love to look back to when I get a little older.

Today April 12, 2010

Look at the tarantula crawling towards my neck. I was scared but enjoying it. It's my forst time to hold a huge spider! It was fun! I'm thinking of buying one for myself

2009-12-22T09:10:00.005+08:00

My first day here in Davao was very exciting. The moment I got off the plane I could not stop thinking about the things I want to see and I want to do. I started my day with a sumptuous meal at a good Lechon House in Chavez. My sister and I went there to take our brunch. I really miss eating Davao’s famous Lechon and as always it did not fall short from my expectation.

After the meal, we went to the beach house. I would say I was a little disappointed that the house is not yet done. Check some of the pictures I took while the workers are working hard to finish the main part of the house in time for Christmas. Ate Donna is giving them instructions on what needs to be prioritized.

My mom drop by for a few minutes to check and I was very happy to see her. She was in the right mood at that time but her presence was the usual Rosario Miguela Braganza Naraval. Hehehe..

We spent some time in the beach house and then I accompanied my sister to the Home Depot in Davao—I forgot the name of the hardware. I thought that you can bargain for tiles but my sister always finds a way. After we finished our business there we visited my Ate Chied and I finally saw Reyean Anthony. She is a very cute and adorable baby.

We went back to the beach house to catch the sunset but we did not make it. Well I will try to catch it maybe tomorrow.

Now I’m here at my Ate Donna’s house in Buhangin and the kids are bugging me while typing this. hahaha

2009-12-21T04:26:00.002+08:00

What excites me about going home?

The new things...
My Ate Chied just gave birth recently and I will finally see the most awaited baby
My Ate Donna is very excited to show me her new house in the beach. We will be spending more time in the beach now!
My Kuya Jong has a fish cage in the beach and I will try fishing again! The last time was not that successful.I caught the fish but getting off the hook was a mess
The house in Buhangin. We'll I have not heard much about it but I want to see it!
New places in Davao, my sister mentioned something about a place that was so cold and we can have bungee jumping there

The people I love..
Of course I want to see my family especially my mom and my grandmother. I usually ask my grandmother to run or walk faster just to remind her that she is not growing old. Age is just a number!
My siblings, I mentioned them already except for Kuya Ken because he is Oman right now.
My nephew and nieces, I'm thrilled to see them but I'm not looking forward to their noisy voices early in the morning. When I'm there they just love to wake you and bug you
My friends, I heard that most if not all will be going back home for Christmas. I'm looking forward to that! Reunion?

The memories...
I want to visit the places I use to hang out like Victoria Plaza, Brokenshire, and Ateneo
I wan to go back to my roots and see the house where I grew up. My sister told me that only my aunt is staying there and half of the house is almost abandoned. I suppose it is still a nice house. I'll make it a point to take a picture
I want to See the river where I use to swim even if it was forbidden.
I want to see the park in my hometown and check if they took care of the area.
I would love to watch a movie just to check if the theater still looks the same or they renovated it. I hope they did!
I want to walk Ilustre where I walk almost everyday when I was still in high school

There is just too many things to look forward to and too many things to be done!

this entry is written while waiting for the plane at Gate S2 in Terminal 2

2009-10-19T13:39:00.002+08:00

You really would not know what is coming. Sometimes what you want just comes in the most unexpected time. Well, for now I will not entertain the thought that much but I'm happy. I'm happy because I have proven that after all that happened, I'm not that insensitive. I'm happy because I confirmed that hot people can still like me. I was scared for a moment there. I thought that I lost my charisma along with turning 26 years old. hahahaha

I'll mark it October 18, 2009 I had a crush on "you". It made me feel young again. I mean super young. You know the shiver and all that jazz. It is just amazing. What I like about this is the fact that I know I can't have him. He is so near yet so far. We'll he is committed and I have no intentions of ruining that relationship. But the holding hands, the massage at the back, the caring words, and the text message that he missed me na daw. buwahahahaha.. and eto pa hiningi niya number ko diba at siya nauna nagtext.. buwahhhhhha.. but really kahit hindi niya hingi number ko hihingin ko din siguro

Uy kilig naman.. hahaha

2009-10-04T14:14:00.004+08:00

ALONE

Lately, I realized that I became too comfortable with my life. I'm contented with my pillows comfort whenever I sleep. I enjoy being with my friends when I need company. I don't complain not getting sweet thoughts from a special someone. I became unused to getting gifts wrapped in fancy papers. I became independent!

I also did not recognize that I was slowly building my own life away from people whom I used to depend on. I started keeping a distance from my housemates and I created a home in my home.

I had several relationships and all ended even before it actually started. I shut them out of my comfort zones because I feel uneasy when they invade my so called "home" or privacy. I have been wounded and it healed. The healing process was so long that I did not realize that I created a shield so strong that no one can break. I didn't know that I engineered myself to become the very thing I feared--BEING ALONE.

2009-05-23T02:00:00.002+08:00

For the longest time I have been praying for a person to come into my life and make me happy. I was hoping and wishing that having that person can fill in the sadness and loneliness that visits my room before I catch my sleep. Everyday I spend time of wallowing over my so called loneliness.

It was just recently that I realized and finally accepted that I'm bound to be alone. Why? Simply because I can't afford having anyone around me. I have taught myself how to stand on my feet and I faced all the trouble in my life alone. I'm an INDEPENDENT person. I can live and be happy all by myself.

hahahaha... SINGLE FOREVER!!!

2009-03-30T12:41:00.002+08:00

Where am I?

Where am I in the journey of life? Am I happy? Am I sad?

I don't know. I have no idea. I think I lost my sense of direction in life when I lost my first love.
Right now, I would say I have everything that I thought would make me happy. I have a good career, supportive friends, nice colleagues, wonderful boss, great family, a generous God, and anything I need except for one--a new love affair.

I miss those nights when you have to stay awake and think about the person you love. I miss having those messages and waiting to receive inspiring thoughts from your love one. I want to go out of town and just cuddle with that person under the cold rainy nights and most of all, I miss the small talks while tucked in bed at night.

I miss being in love.

2009-03-20T17:22:00.000+08:00

This YEAR IS DIFFERENT

A few years back, I declared, believed, shared, and convinced myself and those who are around me that I was brutally misused, abused, and abandoned by the one person who I claim to be the sole reason why I'm here in Manila. He was my one true love and mortal enemy--my EX. After the break up, I declared war and boy you have no idea how good I was at it.

I would say I was successful in making his life miserable. With the help of my brain neurons and friends, I was able to corrupt my EX’s mind and convince him that his life was miserable. I painted that picture in his head by making him realize how easy his life will be if we’ll stick together. Yes! I want vengeance and I want him back that’s why I abused his vulnerability.

To make the long story short, I succeeded in my evil plan. We were back in each other arms in the hope that the old adage “love is sweeter the second time around” will apply in our life. To my disappointment, it didn’t work that way. Our relationship was worse than ever. We started to hook up with other guys and explored the world of open relationship which we thought was the solution but it turned out to be the reason for our second break up.

This was the time that my mind was convinced that I could not continue on harboring surplus love and affection. That’s why I finally decided to let him go for good and become friends. At first, I thought I can handle that type of relationship but every time I see him with his new boyfriend it made me feel inferior. I can’t take the thought of being inferior so I declared war thinking that I can hurt my enemy by making my life successful. I want him to be envious and beg me to get him back.

My plan was to be BETTER. Have a better place, better salary, better position, better family, better in every way. I was successful in almost everything except for one—BETTER PARTNER. In my search for a better partner I unconsciously turned to him as the benchmark to the point that I wanted my new partners to be like him. Of course, I can’t turn them into the man that I want them to be so I just end up frustrated and lonely.

Now everything will change. This year will be different. I’ll start building my foundation by re-establishing my lost identity.

One thing I realized in my so called relationships, I loved my partners so much that I let them rule my life. I allowed them to paint me in a corner and orchestrate my future. In the course of time I forgot who I am and what I can be.

2009-03-20T14:43:00.004+08:00

NOT PERFECT

I realized that sometimes being perfect makes life miserable. Take mine as an example. Just a few days back I have to delay my lunch, skip my breaks, etc just so that I can show to my teammates how to be a model leader--a leader that is always there to help. But I'm tired of being perfect. I want to relax and loosen up. I know it's not a crime to slow down but it seems impossible to do. Just the thought of not being there kills me. My conscience can't handle the idea that I'll be nowhere to find when something uncalled for happens. Say when there's an imporatnt question, n escalated call, anything. Haist! I don't mean to let go of duties and responsibilities, I just want to have the heart to live a life while working, not kill myself at work!

Sometimes I feel that I'm making my world too small for me to breath. It seems liek my life is full of restraints and rules that created a huge wall which eventually trapped me in a rat hole. However, I will never allow that to happen again. From this point forward I will be carefree and will relieve that free spirit in my heart. I know it has been waiting to burst and now is time to set it free. To truly live and be who I was before and who I thought I will be!

Now is the perfect time to loosen up and enjoy what life will offer. Be grateful of whatever comes along and find ways to grow it!

2008-11-26T13:53:00.003+08:00

No matter what you do,
Where you go,
Who you are with,

Whether you lose your friends,
Meet a new one.
End a relationship,
or start a new one
At the end of the day...
You are ALONE

2008-09-27T16:15:00.003+08:00

USAHAY

Usahay sobra kaayo ang gugma. Wala man unta nimo hilabti pero sige ug panghilabot. Nilikay na gani ka pero sige ug gukod. Pirte kaayo ka KSP. Kusog kaayo maminuang human inig seryosohon nimo mawala baya. Hayyyyy... Pabadlong uy!

2008-08-18T13:28:00.001+08:00

Wala lang.. minsan para akong gago na naghahabol sa bagay na hindi ko alam kung me paroroonan.. Walang me gusto walang me kasalanan pero merong nasasaktan--ako.

GAGO diba?

2008-03-26T19:38:00.002+08:00

NOT GOOD ENOUGH?

I remember how it used to be
My life was very easy
Simple things made me smile
When you were there at my side

But now that you are gone
Now that the past can't be undone
I have questions to ask
To all that i have been with in the past

How can this be that I'm alone
In a world where everyone
is looking for attention
Is there something wrong
Or I'm just not worthy of your attention?

Sometimes I find it hard to believe
How easy for some people to leave
They turn their backs without regret
As if it I'm that easy to forget

But now that they're gone
Now that that the past can't be undone
I have questions to ask
To all that I have been with in the past

What have I done or did not do
To be trapped exactly where you come and go
Did you cast a spell to make me suffer
Or I'm just not good enough to be someone else's lover

2008-03-24T00:33:00.002+08:00

Black Hole
by paulo

A powerful heavy load
that barely weighs a gram
It opened millions of windows
but brought me into darkness in an instant;
Told me the truth
yet ironically lied about it
It was my spring for joy and
my fountain for sadness

It was MY OWN Black Hole
that comes in hazel brown rays
MY EYES

goodnight:)

2008-03-24T00:11:00.003+08:00

Eclipse

Walk with him
Hold his hand tight
Laugh like there's no tomorrow
And when the sun is about to set
Stop and clutch his hand tight
Face him and say:
"Why did you cheat on me?"

2007-10-21T18:44:00.000+08:00

(Kelly, Chiara, Ymon,ME,Ela,and May) Awel was taking the pix!

They made my birthday perfect. I love my babies so much!!!

Guys,

Thanks a lot. You made me realize that I don't need anyone exclusively mine to be happy. Now I know that my effort were truly appreciated. I love you all...

Dong,

Thanks for risking one day for me. it brings back the good old days.

Al,

Thanks for being so nice to me.

Kelly,

You are the best! Thanks for setting this up for me! You made me so happy. Thanks to your mom as well.

My babies,

Thanks a lot! You guys are the best!

May,

Thaks for the scrapbook. The letter made by my friends really touched me and I love the Mrvin surprise.. hehehe (The best)

What happened during my bday; (roughly 3days celebration)

Oct 5

I went out with my ex

Had a date

then sleep

Oct 6

I woke up at 9am and my agents asked me out to the party they made for me (in Cavite)

After the Cavite Party, we went to Awel's place to have a Videoke party(Las Piñas)

Went home

Donn and PJ asked me to go out (Donn treat me out)

I won't say anything about how it end but it was a blast! (Oct 6-7)

2007-09-14T09:51:00.000+08:00

Be Happy

Give it up Pau.. you deserve a break. Don't kill yourself. Learn how to love every moment and always look on the brighter side! You deserve it!

2007-09-10T12:20:00.000+08:00

Empty

You are a pathetic asshole! You want to have a relationship but you never prepare yourself to be ready for one. You cry for love but doesn't bother looking at the options presented infront of you!

Do you want to love or are you inlove with the idea of love! You can't seem to get enough of what you have! Remember the time when someone who was so in love with you came? Remember the time when all he does is keep track of what you are doing? What did you do? Didn't you make excuses of being too busy with work? Didn't you shut him off? Now where is he? He's gone... Where are you?

I bet right now you can only say I DON'T KNOW!

FUCK!!! Shape up man! Grow up! You have been preaching that for a long time and yet you can't pactice it!

2007-08-19T12:14:00.000+08:00

PATHETIC CRY

I just feel sad right now. I do not know why. As I type this message all that runs in my mind are the pain and sadness of being alone. I wanted to have a special someone and yet every time someone knocks on my door there is always a reason for me to say no. Sometimes I think Lee is right, I'm just too choosy. But would you like to settle for less? I doubt!

Lord, I know that you can read my thoughts. I will post this message so I can solicit for prayers. I will let the world know my cry for love. I can't be alone. Everyday I wake up alone in my bed wishing that someone would come to my rescue, but no one did. I can't stand this anymore!

Am I just blind? Am I so caught up with my standards that I let too many people pass?

I'm tired of my life here in Manila and going home seems to me as act of cowardliness. I want to live a simple life and I want to settle down as early as I can. Please send someone who will love me and someone I can love. Today I saw someone in my dream who claims to be my lover. I can vividly picture his face and I'm certain I haven't seen him yet. Lord, make a little simple for me if you don't mind. Could you show him in my dreams?

2007-07-02T23:38:00.000+08:00

I was lost and Now I'm lost again...

These past few days I've been thinking about going home. Something is telling me that I should go back to Davao and start anew. With that thought in mind I called my sister. She told me how they miss me and that they are happy every weekend because they all go to church together. She even said that they still conduct Family Home Evening. We'll it just made me realize how much I'm missing in life. Now, I'm beginning to regret my decision of staying here in Makati. If I sum it up, all I can see is myself trading a peaceful life for a life not worth living. I know it sounds a little overboard, so just to be politically correct, my life here is not a trash. I just lost the excitement that used to fire up my day. I have no inspiration. I lost my drive to succeed and push myself to the limits. I don't know where to draw strength and to top it all, I have evil thoughts of being the person I despise! It scares me a lot, that one day I'll wake up not knowing who I am and why I'm here.

My roots are pretty conservative. I grew up in family that attends Sunday school. My parents were separated but that didn't hinder my grandmother from raising me the way she was raised. When I was 8, my Lola used to wake me up at 4:00 am so we can get ready for the 5:00 am Mass, that was when she was a Roman Catholic, when we became a Mormon, the routine was changed and the passion for religion was magnified. The daily church visit was taken out of her list but it was replaced by regular visits with church members, church cooking lessons, Family Hoe Evenings, preaching with the Elders, and a long list of church activities. That was how I was raised. Pretty much, my world then evolves around my studies, church, and regular visit to the farm.

I think I'm being punished! I'm not living the teachings of my Church now. I smoke, I drink, and I disobeyed most of God's commandments as noted in the Holy Bible. And to cover up for my disobedience I tell people I practice personal religion. Yes! It is a lame excuse but it worked for a time, however, not that long though. I may have convinced other people but I just can't convince myself.

2007-06-19T15:15:00.000+08:00

Paranoia

What would you do if one morning you'll wake up with blisters all over your face?
Me??? I'll get off my bed gracefully, take a shower, eat my breakfast, lit a cigarette, send a goodbye message to my friends, and burn myself. In that way, my family will be forced to bury me under a close coffin... Ohhhh myyyy... The thought scares me to death...

Well, My housemate and close friend Junville acquired chicken pox last week. It's a disease that is highly contagious and can easily be transmitted through air or physical contact. The good news is that, it can only infect you once in a lifetime. Study says that once you develop antibodies, you have 70%-90% chance of not acquiring it again. Unfortunately, I never had chickenpox and to make things worse, I was not vaccinated either. Now, I'm facing the risk of being infected.

But you know Paulo... He will not die without fighting!

So... first thing in the morning, I jump out of bed and started sending sms to my friends asking where I could get vaccination. Few responded and referred me to several hospitals and clinics. One told me to check Ospital ng Makati, another referred me to Makati Med, and my instinct tells me to just visit Patients First.

I then decided to visit Ospital ng Makati. WhenI got there, I saw that GMA was filming something in the area. At the back of my mind I thought, if I won't get the vaccine, my dream of being a star will never come true.. hahahaha pathetic! I walked to the entrance and saw a man in the receiving area. I asked him if I can get vaccination for chickenpox. I think he was a little busy and he just pointed the direction and said "go to the laboratory". With determination, I trudge my way to the lab and got a simple word "we don't do that here, check Makati med!". I then went to Makati Med and was told to go to Medical Plaza, and the girl from Maxicare referred me to Patients First saying it will cost me 2500Php for the vaccination. Bang! It hit me hard, it's expensive! I started having second thoughts .

I asked my friends from NSI if they know where I can get a cheaper vaccine. No one knew! Good thing that my friend Jake, a doctor now residing in Taiwan, called from overseas just to tell me that getting the vaccination won't help as of the moment because it will take time to develop the antibodies. He advised me to simply take my vitamins and stay away from Junville. Well, that advise saved me a lot! Thanks Jake!

Still I'm scared!

2007-06-17T07:45:00.000+08:00

State of Despair... State of Oblivion...

Sometimes when you push yourself too hard, you end up falling. It's probably because the mind was conditioned to do something that was perceived by the subconscious as impossible. It begins when the momentum is interrupted by unprecedented incidents. Take my agents as an example. For the past couple of months, they were conquering the controversial metric that we call CSAT in my account. Their success was phenomenal that some I guess were raising a brow thinking that they just got lucky. Well, luck could be a factor but hitting it twice in a row requires more than just mere luck. It's a feat! This somehow made my Bankers think that they were impregnable. Until the awakening moment hit us! The snowball fell one by one and it eventually trickles down into an avalanche. Bang! Oblivion! Like the old adage says, if you're on top, there's no other way but going down!

Too bad, just today we hit rock bottom low (72.00%). I know it's dispappointing but I'll cut them some slack...

Ohh God, what am I talking about? I should stop thinking about work!
You know what? What else is there to think about? hehehe

Lately, I've been thinking. How come I'm not contented of my uncomplicated life? Am I a masochist that is in constant search for pain? I hope I'm not!

BTW: Today I will start my weekend. Nothing much to look forward to.. I mean nothing at all! hahaha... I do manage to keep my life boring that's why my colleagues call me a pathetic freak. Boredom is my favorite hobby... Want to join the club?
Just post a comment!

2007-06-04T13:50:00.000+08:00

What a morning... I woke up with a little headache and starving. Just like any ordinary day, I whine in bed before getting up, sending messages to my friends. When suddenly...

OH MY GOSH! My friend saw Whitney Houston's new video clip! I have been wanting to see her back and here.. I missed my one chance to see it (joke)! So.. I decided to check youtube to see if someone was kind enough to upload that video....

TO MY DISAPPOINTMENT... there's no clip!

CLIP MY ASS! hmp!

A WASTE OF TIME :(

note: the pic is not related to the entry but (old pic with me, Ate Ranet, and Dean)

2007-03-12T13:44:00.000+08:00

Not in the Mood for s**... hahaha.. funny but it's true. In my life there is always this time in the year that I hit ground zero when it comes to libido... I don't know if its a good sign but I guess.. he is close.. hahaha.. dream on pau.. dream on...

In times like this I always manage to get myself preoccupied with other things. I don't know how it happens but it happened. I get busy sleeping, updating my blog, checking my friendster, watching movies... tons of other things. On the brighter side, I'm productive.. very productive at that!

FYI... I think I'm infatuated... I hope he likes me... Hayyyyy.. I don't think he is ready to commit as of yet and if he is I might not be his type at all. I think he is just being nice to me... Wanna see his pic? We'll I won't upload it here. I don't want him to get embarrased. hehehehe

BTW, I updated my friendster and photos here, you may wanna hit on the flickr button on this blog.. its the slideshow on the upper right... I'll post more picture in the coming days... I have been planning to travel...

Next trip?? To heaven.. hahahahahahahahaha

2007-03-09T12:59:00.000+08:00

SOMEDAY
nina

Someday you’re gonna realize
One day you’ll see this through my eyes
By then I won’t even be there
I’ll be happy somewhere
Even if I cared

I know you don’t really see my worth
You think you’re the last guy on earth
Well I’ve got news for you
I know I’m not that strong
But it won’t take long
Won’t take long (cause)

Chorus:

Someday someone’s gonna love me
The way I wanted you to need me
Someday someone’s gonna take your place
One day I’ll forget about you
You’ll see, I won’t even miss you
Someday someday

Right now I know you can tell
I’m down and I’m not doing well
But one day these tears they will all run dry
I won’t have to cry, sweet goodbye

(Repeat Chorus)

I know someone’s gonna be there

(Repeat Chorus)

I know someday.. someday I will learn to forget about this image...

Someday... I will have my fair share of love... I would like to think that right now.. I'm just getting ready for that person.

Whoever you are, wherever you are.. I'm just here waiting... And when you come.. I will be ready...

I hope and pray that It wont be too late...

2007-03-04T06:37:00.000+08:00

It's been awhile that I never had a time for myself. So I decided to unwind. I thought of drink... ALONE... hehehe.. BTW, its not by choice nor by chance.. its my sad situation right now... Partly, its my fault, I admit. I am too picky and too boring for others to be with.

Hell with the "Do not talk to strangers" thing. They approached me so who am I not to talk to them. Besides they were nice and nothing harm was done and I really intended not to hook up with anyone that night. I want to be ALONE. I deserve to be ALONE.

Guess who else I met there? hahaha.. I know not everyone knows him.. But I met Benj and he was with his BF. Good for him. I hope that he really love that person. He said something that bothered me. Anyways, wish him the best!!!

2007-03-02T23:32:00.000+08:00

When you hit them! Hit 'em hard!

I like that line.. not in bed though(joke).. hahaha!!! Well, there comes a point in life that we have to be rough and tough. We have to be cut throat but not ruthless. It's not my personality but I have to do it. Don't get me wrong.. it's not against my will nor my principle.. it's just that I try not to recourse to iron hand management if possible. However, when they get too lenient.. too relax.. to the point that they affect the interest of the majority, then the right action has to made. Like the saying goes..

"Hurt them where it hurts most!"

(same goes to my love boat)

2007-02-24T15:45:00.000+08:00

These are my angels....................

2007-02-21T22:41:00.000+08:00

It's been awhile since I last updated this blog... I guess for the longest time in my life I didn't find anything worthwhile to write. A lot of pressing issues arose that preoccupied my mind to the point that 90.00% of my time is spent resting, trying to recover from a stressful day.

I f you would ask me how I'm doing...well, my life is a total mess for the last couple of months. Work demands too much of my time and I exerted too much effort on it, in the hopes of getting good results yet it just got worse as time passed by. There were abrupt changes implemented and it gravely afffected me and my team. On top of that my love boat is in total wreck(nothing new). To sum it all... I'm just lost...

Right now, I'm starting to pick the pieces where I left off last 2 months. I'm trying to build a new life and a new hope. This is another crossroad and the only way out is to make a decision even if it scares the shit out of me. I know that starting up is really hard but I don't have any choice. The only option I have... is to assess and evaluate myself and I realign my actions towards achieving my goals. God help me!

My hopes...
I hope that I would be able to weigh the consequences of my actions independently
I hope that the process would be less painful as I expect it to be
I hope that I will truly find the place where I truly belong...
I hope that he will come...(you know what I mean)

-Om Shanti-

2006-09-24T12:58:00.000+08:00

Finally the training is over. I was hoping to say that after the graduation in transition but I guess I learned to love the team and I'm having a hard time letting go of the good experiences I had. I will surely miss my Batch! WAMU 9 go! go! go!

2006-09-17T09:36:00.000+08:00

I finished the first week of transition in WAMU. You know what I really miss NSI... You know the fun and the comfort. I just miss it soooo much. I like WAMu and some people there but its really hard to leave your HOME.. hayyy.. I miss Van, Niq, and the entire NSI... huhuhuhu

2006-09-11T14:45:00.000+08:00

Charmed

Since it was my restday yesterday I decided to watch and finish atleast Season 4 of my favorite TV Series--Charmed. In my excitement I bought snacks as provision for my one day marathon. I thoguht I had everything all set for fun fun fun. When suddenly, the DVD 9 won't work in my player! It ws like.. OHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MYYYYYYYY God! So much about the plan.. I just settled for the cartoons Val bought and also the Project Runway Junville had. OHHHH I guess I was CHARMED!!!

2006-09-11T10:37:00.000+08:00

Walang Magawa!!! Frozen Throne to death with Junville!!! hehehehe

Laban na mga kapatid!!! hehehe

2006-09-10T10:52:00.000+08:00

Check this out!!!! God shes so fabulous!!!

2006-09-10T09:58:00.000+08:00

Days come and go...

So many things happened to me. I went home to Davao because of my grandpa's death. I got promoted as Sup trainee in WAMU, which is quite a challenge. It's so amazing because I have been riding the waves of life and I dont know where I am right now. I want to move somewhere but I dont know where. Hayyyyy ewan ko ba. Things are getting rough inside and even tougher outside. Emotionally I'm unstable, sometimes I just want to be alone, to be free. Sometimes I want to cling to my past and hope that someday I can relive it.

Sometimes, I think this is all happening because I lack God's guidance. I never prayed and really knelt and ask for His help. The thing is, I'm a bit hesitant to face Him 'cause I have been so blessed by Him. Parang ang selfish kung puro nalang ako. hehehe.. Pero minsan isip ko ang yabang ko naman not to ask for His help. Ewan...

I'm just calling... and kept on calling.. Hope someone will hear me!!!

Help!!!!

2006-05-01T01:30:00.000+08:00

There's a Greener Pasture Inside the Fence

I heard the news and could never believed it!

I got promoted!

What?

Promoted!

Yes promoted! hehehe

I wanna repeat it a thousand times. It's my dream and I never thought that it will ever happen. Thanks to Monique and all the QA Analyst most specially to Van. I will not fail you guys.. no matter what... To the person I love who submitted my application (Val) thank you so so so much. Thanks you for pushing me to the limit. Finally it paid off dong...

Thanks also to all the supervisors who molded me into becoming a good agent. To my friends on the floor, thanks for the support!!! I don't want to mention any names because you know who you are!

Above all THANK YOU LORD!!! I know you have a greater plan and I hope I won't fail you this time. You're supposed to get tired of me but you never did! I love you!!!

2006-03-11T02:16:00.000+08:00

When I Woke Up...

Its 4:30 am and its a bit darker than usual. After taking a bath I rushed to my bed and took a good morning sleep. Much to the good morning, Joyce came home with siren sound "Baha". Hell... I felt like the icecaps from the North Pole melted right in the middle of Makati. I can't only see the water, I'm literally floating over it. Well, it's not everyday that you see your room turned into a swimming pool overnight. I could hear my doctors advise saying "You have to go swimming class regularly to help reduce the pain caused by your scoliosis". I think it's a reminder for me that I have to enroll to swimming lesson soon.

Today is not that bad... BCOZ... it's my rest day later!!! hehehe.. I think I deserve a rest, after sleeping over the swamp without my knowledge. I definitely need a rest!!!

2006-03-10T00:46:00.000+08:00

Back on the Road

Extreme measures sometimes does not give out extreme results. Just when you give out your best you fall short with the recompense--very disappointing. However, life does not end there (though I love to end it).

Lately, I stumble into things that reminds me of my past. It's a deja vu thing and I love doing it repeatedly. I was hoping I could still live with it but I guess not. Re-living the past is good but getting hooked to it is fatal. Too bad I'm a hooker and a sucker of hope. I never really give up until my heart's scattered over the plate for dinner.

I'm hurt for no reason at all. I feel empty and demand more attention. The big problem is that I'm alone. I have no one to cling to in times like this. Most of the time I just doze off myself with cigarette or Korean movies. But even that can't appease me. I need an inspiring divertion. I dunno.. something wild and exciting probably.. like bungee jumping in an extraordinary way like tying the rope on the neck!!!hahaha

Isn't it funny to think of ending one's life while others are dying to live the life you are living. Yes! Unfortunately, the dilemma I'm in is not living it but merely existing in a world where survival seems to be the sole reason for existence. Well I guess, all I can do now is be back on the road and hope one day I'll hit the right spot.

2006-02-01T21:33:00.000+08:00

Nothing

The sad truth of nothing lies in an empty heart. A heart that wanders and wonders hoping that one day God will throw one of His angel to save the day. But of course that only happens in fairytale movies or in the controversial book of Mr. Frey (you know what I mean-lies). *sigh* I'm not asking for a fantasy island, I'm just begging for peace of mind and a decent life, that's all. Is that too much to ask, to have?

Yesterday, I heard myself telling Globel(a friend) that happiness is a state of mind. Well, I guess it only applies to those who are not in the state of calamity. Yeah, my boat is sinking and as the captain of the ship I must abandon it. Ahahaha -joke- I hope I have the courage to do that!!! Courage!!! I invoke the spirit of courage and for the last three weeks what I got was the spirit of wine and beer and it shattered me into gazillion pieces!

I have been dating and unfortunately, I was just dating. No magic, no divine intervention or some cupids arrow that causes heart shaped bubbles to spurt out of your dilated pupils. I didn't say they were boring, of course, they were goodlooking well to do men who can take you to fantasy island if you'd only let them. Unfortunately, I can't because I'm hooked to some evil vortex that engulfs my inner soul(they usually call it stupid love). And only stupid people like me loves to patronize the idea of martyrdom. Well, atleast I know I'm guilty.(applause please)

Guilty as I maybe, it doesn't change the fact that I'm going through nothing. And it scares the hell out of me.

2006-01-22T16:00:00.000+08:00

One Big Sigh

Manny Pacquiao won today and I was knocked off! Yeah! TKO by the some ruthless liar who just can't get enough out of a masochist named Paulo. Don't I get the idea? He's just not into me! And he enjoys the thought that I'm still clinging over my stinking past rotting in my closet.

Well... patience pau.. PATIENCE... few more months and you'll see the light! If only I can control my emotions and jump off from false hopes-I already did. So friends, Romans, and countrymen... don't cast your judgment over me! Yeah, I get it, this is stupidity. Let me just tire myself and I'll soon come back to sanity. OK?

2005-12-27T21:57:00.000+08:00

The pain still remains... It lingers... It consumes every bright day... I hope this will end soon!!!

2005-10-26T18:45:00.000+08:00

My Prayer

Heavenly Father, I come to kneel before thee... Hoping You would hold me tight and hug me... Make me feel wanted.. make me feel whole...

My world is shattered before my eyes and darkness oveshadows every bright day.. I see no hope.. I see no love... I'm getting blind.. getting weak.. I'm wounded.. I was stabbed.. I died... I died with my heart beating so fast...

Why am I losing my life? I know I have wronged thee... I know I'm not a worthy christian.. I know I don't deserve happiness... But please... ease my pain, take away my sorrow and uplift me from this pit...

If having peace would mean death then I offer my life to thee... take me... Take me... I want to be by your side...

Your Son,

paulo

2005-10-24T20:42:00.000+08:00

My Love

Get a lump of clay
Divide it into two
Mold one and name it VAl
And the other name it Popoy

Sprinkle a little of water
Then out of the two figure
Make a wonderful vase

Always remember:
Pieces of you are pieces of me
Pieces of me are pieces of you

2005-10-19T16:59:00.000+08:00

Karma

I worked for three months just to get the priority number that would give me the schedule I wanted. Too bad, some people just play some rules and bypassed those that really deserves to get the sked... To them:

2005-09-27T21:39:00.000+08:00

How to Get High Without Using Drugs?

Wake up at 1:00 pm then take a shower. Wake everyone who's sleeping and drag them if they won't. Dress up as if you are going out but you're really not. Then go out and get cab. When you reach your destination, go to your locker and get your things. Afetr 9 hours of serving both sarcastic and ungrateful customer.. success.. your HIGH.. you can start banging your head... like this

2005-09-22T18:18:00.000+08:00

sA+UrA+i0n

I just feel tired, pressured, bored, sooooo saturated.

I hate to wish because I don't know if I still can. I hope that the feeling would go away..

Bring me back.. bring me home... take me wherever you can.. I want to fly...

I can't see where I'm heading but I'm not lost... hope I'm not..

2005-09-16T14:50:00.000+08:00

Two Years and 11 Months

...of warm embrace in cold rainy nights
...of petty quarrels and kiss and make-ups
...of laughs and cries that only us can hear
...of jealousy and pride
...of funny moments and corny jokes
...of keeping secrets and slowly revealing them
...of sweet nothings and thoughful gifts
...of being afraid of losing each other
...of endless love

2005-09-12T19:32:00.000+08:00

Kind Heart

There are still good people around. Minsan lang hindi natin napapansin pero ang dami pala. I never thought that there's someone who'll give out something that most people really love, specially the skin concious peeps. All I can say to that person.. Thank you... God bless...

To everyone there.. Its never too late to share. You can always start with a smile.

2005-09-01T20:12:00.000+08:00

I Once Was Lost But Now Am Found

In a world of rules everyone always gets lost. I guess that's human nature. We simply can't get away from what the majority think is right, what our culture dictates, and what the people around us believes. We are lost because we do not have the heart to speak our mind. Instead, we lay back, conform, and hide in our closets.

I have found a number of people who took the risk. They went out tried to utter the words of their minds voice. At first it was just a whisper and then comes a cry. The next thing I knew, they were gone. Someone took their heart out of them. Brave heart indeed invites envy. It invites the corrupt and those that believes in rigid rules! But it never ends there. Look around you, you'll see that people like them are growing, growing like weeds. What they did was simply cut the grass, they forgot about the roots.

There are things in our life that can never be learned nor taught. It can be faked but can never be kept forever-that is the root.

2005-08-29T16:49:00.000+08:00

Shattered Pieces

"Don't cry over spilled milk", impossible, ridiculous, and at the very least, preposterous!

Have you experienced crying without teardrops in your eyes? I did... several times. I cried and nobody knew that I was crying. I cried while I was laughing, going out with friends, and even when I was at the peak of what seems to be a joyous day. I cried even without reason, and if there was, it was beyond my comprehension, beyond my consciousness.

It's hard when you cry over spilled milk but I can't help it! My eyes may not produce tears but my unconscious mind is screaming like hell. Its crying incessantly that I feel like I'm being haunted by some monster from the past.

Why am I telling you this? It's because I'm crying right now... I'm crying over spilled milk. The glass is slowly breaking right infront of my face. It's within my reach but I'm watching it break! I'm a spectator of my life's drama! Isn't that a torture? Am I a masochist or just naive! I don't know...

There is just one thing I want to share with you, if you can cry with teardrops in your eyes... CONSIDER YOURsELF LUCKY!

2005-08-23T21:19:00.000+08:00

Losing Myself

Recently, I don't find anything to write about. Not that I have nothing in mind but I have nothing worth writting from my heart. Yes, I feel empty. There are events that took me by surprise but did not push me to publish it online. I'm not sure if I'm just tired or slowly becoming pathetic to life.

Honestly, I don't see any bang! There is no spark that triggers me or excites me. My life is becoming dry and it slowly engulfs my persona into oblivion. I hate to say this but I think I might get dumb soon or yet I'll lose my sanity. Whatelse to lose?

You might ask, what pushes me to live? I don't know, that's a question that most of us who are lost could not answer. We just try to exist. That's it! I live not to please my family, my lover, my friends, not even God. I think I'm living because there is no where else to go. I'm sorry to say those words but I feel that I cannot claim that I live for someone I don't obey, love, care, at the very essence of obeying, loving, and caring.

I know God understands me. I'm lost and this is not the first time. How I wish I'll come across a crossroad again so I could trudge another path that would help me find myself.

2005-08-11T19:50:00.000+08:00

Doesn't Mean Anything

I just luurrrvvv this song.. It is so so so nice.. Does not apply to my life though but I luurrrvvv it... check out and sing to the tune of....

Magical feeling
Mymp

I was in a car crash
Thrown up like trash
Slap twice, stabbed thrice
It felt so real
Baby what's the deal
Look straight into my eyes
You told me all these lies

I didn't see it coming
I didn't see it happening
That one day you'd be leaving me hanging

Chorus:

I'm happy you left me
I’m glad (i prayed) that you hurt me
It's a magical feeling
Knowing that you're not meant for me

Heavy rains poured on me
Lightning struck and hit me
Slap twice, step thrice
It felt so real
Baby what's the deal
Look straight into my eyes
You told me all these lies
I didn't see it coming
I didn't see it happening
That one day you'd be leaving me hanging

(repeat chorus)

People say you're crazy
But baby don't you worry
Life has been easier without you
We should have done this earlier.

(repeat chorus 2x)

2005-08-08T17:58:00.000+08:00

True Love

Right now I just want to say something I can't, not because I'm afraid of saying it but because I just don't know how to put the right words to make it sound atleast almost like how I feel it. You know why? I'm very happy, not only for myself but for two people who touched my life and help me realize how lucky I am in this world.

There are really things, situations, and people around us that we always take forgranted just because we come accross with them almost everyday of our life. They are part of our daily routine and each day that pass reduces their value in our conscious mind. Often than not we hear their words in passing, take their sweet actions forgranted, and see them as if you know them too well that they are uncapable of pulling any surprise.

On the contrary, I was surprised! They caught me unguarded and the situation swept me away-that was for a week. One morning I just woke up realizing that the person that I don't value so much(according to my conscious mind) is sought by people who desires to be on my position. Amazing, it never occurred to my mind that I'm sitting in a throne.

With God's intervention, I reacted decently. At first, it was nothing but being civil and all. I tightened my belt and acted as if I'm in control. I told myself I'm the master of this ship-but deep inside I'm slowly realizing that I'm running a sinking ship and this was all because of my fault, my negligence. I know I need to act now. I hope I can do something. Incase I won't, I have someone who'll be there to take my place, someone I know who is worthy of being on my shoes.

I feel so happy...I think I understand love more than I did before. I have grown as a person because of these people. The person whom I think would end my reign will not end it. He is not quitting the fight because we are running the ship. We have the same goal though trudging in different tracks..

To the person who helped me.. Thank you...

2005-08-05T00:11:00.000+08:00

Touching my Heart

Just today I got an email coming from one of my friends on the floor. The beautiful and wagi na gurlash na si (drum rolls) January. She sent me a forwarded message containing the pictures of Jesus Christ created using pencil. Yah.. you read it right "lapis po". Napakanta tuloy ako ng.. Isn't it lovely, isn't wonderful? na na na na.. ayan hindi ko na alam ang lyrics.

Recently, I feel so close to the Lord. Lagi na akong nagyayaya na magchurch. Ewan, I think God is taking me to Heaven para mag shopping. Sana lang si Lord noh at hindi si bestfriend Lucy. We'll bahala na.

By the way, I'm very happy now kasi mature na talaga ako. Before, when I find out that someone is interested with my baby I usually freak out and resort violence. Iba pa naman ako pagnagagalit kasi nagyayaya ako ng suntukan, kala ko malaki ang katawan. I'm just glad at mabait na ako. I'm thankful na rin ke Lord kasi siya naman and dahilan kun bakit ganito na ako ngayon eh.

Good news pala!!! KITTY AND AMY are here in Makati. Rhyme ba? kittyandamykittyandamykittyandamy. Pwedeng tandem diba? The Amy and Kitty Show... Well so much about that, last Sunday, my babay had a date with Xela, ako naman date with Amy and Kitty. NAg church kami then eat then taaaaallllllllllllkkkkkk... We have so many things to tell. Siya nga pala baka magkikita kami this sat para magtsange.

2005-08-04T02:00:00.000+08:00

First Love Never Dies

When things go worst and the look gets mad, you can't help but go back to the past. That's love.. kahit anong gawin mo babalik ka parin. hehehe..

Saan ka man naroon
babalik karin
babalik ohhh babalik ka rin

Wahhhhhhhh kala niyo sino??? template ko po.. balik sa dati.. hehehe

2005-07-13T21:04:00.000+08:00

Shift Bid

Ayyy naku, like any other shift bid… PAHIRAPAN. Our schedules in the fax team are for the gods but hell I hate VIPs skeds!!! Right now its either we take the 12am or 3pm shift which means that we need a drastic change both in time and with the people that we will be dealing with-new supervisor and new seatmates. Honestly, I hate the thought of leaving Ms. Chi. She is one of the best supervisors I had. Alam mo yun, she always gives us updates and we always have meetings. Hayyy... I hope God will give me a supervisor like her... And for the shift bid... God
luck to everyone..

Our Country(Do we still have ONE?)

There is a "big" rally in Ayala right now while Im writing this letter. Good thing that we are staying in the new building-buendia corner ayala, or else we will be walking the road of hell again because of the stupid rally that will pull down the already ailing economy. I know that they have the reason to ask her to step down but I also know that we do not have any one better who will replace her at the moment not unless if we will have a snap election. Urggg... I pity those who were paid to go with the rally because they are the ones who will be greatly affectly incase Mr. Peso will jump the building.

New Stuffs

My baby and Derrick are into body building right now and I will be joining them very soon. Today Im supposed to join them but Im too sleepy. Well, Im looking forward to be Mr. "Macho-man" woooohhhh
Look at that!!! Hope this will be the #17

2005-07-05T07:17:00.000+08:00

It has been years since I last updated my blog… So so so missed my blog… huhuhu…

I think my baby already plugged the reason why I don’t have the chance to update. I’m the newest team member of the FAX TEAM. Before I usually tell my customers that “THE PAX TIM IS IN THE PAX DEPARTMENT”. Now, I am a “PAX MEMBER”.. hehehehe

At first, I find it really hard to be a processing agent (I’m not saying its easier now) but with the help of the Vets everything seems to be a lot easier than I thought. We’ll you have to smoothen some edges but that’s just part of trying to fit in.

TO THE FAX TEAM:

2005-06-24T22:10:00.000+08:00

Lipat Bahay

Its our last day on the floor...huhuhu Hindi po magreresign maglilipat na po. We will be staying at our new home, our new building at ayala corner buendia malapit sa makati med. Hay.. honestly hindi ako masyado nagandahan sa place. Siguro kasi naninibago pa. Yung pagka ayos naman eh medyo parang factory pero mind you nakacarpet naman ang factory na ito.. hehehe.. Sana lang ma enjoy kami dun

2005-06-23T22:06:00.000+08:00

About Some of my friends

Restricted na ang Blogspot.com

Oh my... Alm niyo ba nagfreak out na ang mga tao sa office bakit naman kasi pati yun konting kaligayahan ay tinanggal na...huhuhu.. marami na po ang mga restrictions...

By the way.. ang mga pictures pala from Dvao d pa na scan. We have no time kasi. Yesterday we drop by in PeopleSupport Center (PSC) and we were toured in the place. OK ang PCs dun kasi mabilis pero anhin mo naman ang mabilis kung lahat na lang ata eh restricted... Eto na po tau ngayon medyo sad ang lola mo. We have to obey the rules.. yun lang!!!

Back in Davao pala.. lets start with my elementary friends

This is Divine Christine Estillore. Among my friends si vyn ang pinakaclose sa akin. I usually share my secrets with her. Halos lahat under the heat of the sun. Pag me problema ako siya ang hingahan ko. She is very nice... as nice very nice to the point minsan na inaabuso ng iba ang pagka nice niya. Minsan nga gusto ko na batukan kasi feel ko minsan eh parang ginagago na siya. No offense sa iba na nagtake advantage kay vyn kung mabasa niyo ito. Sana lang mahalin niyo si vyn the way that she is supposed to be loved po!

Meron na boyfriend si vyn si None. Thats how she calls him kasi Fernan ang name. Minsan nga nakakatuwa kung tinatanong mo in english kasi parang wala siyang bf diba? Like, whose your bf vyn? then sagot siya.. none... hehehe.. Hi none, wag ka magalit ha.. si vyn kasi yun ang name gamit niya kahit sa text. Well, to be honest naman medyo hindi kami close ni none kasi some of my friends say somethings I don't really like. Its not that I dont trust none kasi I know he loves vyn.. Hindi lang talaga kami nagkaron ng time na mag-usap.. Siguro in time.. Si none pala ay nagwork sa Gensan tapos si vyn sa business nila sa Davao.. Diba ang layo..

This is Jimma Mayon.. Hindi po siya bulkan at hindi rin po ganun ang ugali niya. Jimma is the mother of the group. Bata pa kami siya ang nagdedecide kun saan kami papunta at anong gawin namin. Kasama niya pala jan sa pic eh yung bf niya.. Sorry po nakalimutan ko ang name. I met his bf na when I went in Davao. Hay wala ako masabi kasi ang aura po nito ay.. super mega bait. Sana hindi ako nagkamali

Kakatapos lang ni Jimma magtake ng boardexam for Nursing.. Pagpumasa siya ipopost ko po dito..hehehe.. Alam niyo ba na ang tatag ng babaeng ito kasi nakatawid siya sa bagyo ng buhay.. Superwoman po ito. I'm proud of you Jimma. I know that God will continue to bless your family.. patawad ha.. wala ako nung kailangan moko... kasi naman si vyn walang sinabi.. kasalanan ko rin kasi di man lang ako nagtanong.. huhuhu.. I feeel guilty nga eh. Pero no joke.. Di ko napansin na ang laki pala ng probz mo that time. I just admire your toughness

This is Kristine Tey. Siya ang pinakakulit sa grupo. Minsan nga dahil sa kakulitan niya eh naparusan siya namin pero siyempre eto pa rin kami magkasama. In the picture ayan na yung soon to be boyfriend niya. hehehe. Nagwork na si Ashik, yan tawag ko sa kanya, sa SM Davao. Somewhere in operation.. Parang production something yung work niya nga anjan sina Joross eh. Sabi niya happy siya sa work dahil sa mga artista na nagvisit sa kanila. Me personal touch daw siya.. as literal po na touch. Mabait and a devote Christian si Ashik. Nung umuwi nga ako eh nalecture pa po ako.

Si Ashik yun tao na very bubly pero serious at times. Pagkaibigan ka niya lalaban yan para sayo hanggang kamatayan. So beware kayo kasi tingnan niyo naman.. yang katawan na yan and mind you nag aral yan ng karate. I'm proud of her kasi insan ka lang makakakita ng friend na ganyan.

HAYYYY... I JUST MISS THEM ALL.. TAMA NA MUNA HA.. HINDI PO LAHAT NG THOUGHTS KO ABOUT THEM EHH NAISULAT KO KASI NGA LIMITED TIME EH.. DAMI PA PO AKONG GUSTONG SABIHIN.. BASTA.. I JUST LOVE THEM ALL

2005-06-21T22:01:00.000+08:00

Missing... Home...

Waking in the sound of rainfall, feeling the cold breeze, and hearing my niece knocking on every door is something that I could not trade for anything in this world. I just miss home.. who would not miss the place you live in for 21 years... I miss you guys... muah

2005-06-20T23:18:00.000+08:00

After two weeks of "rest".. We are back!!! Ayaw man nating magwork ulit pero reality bites ika nga. We have to earn kaya eto nanaman tayo back to normal. Kahit papano I missed the NSI floor.. not the floor ha, siyempre yun mga tao-mga kakulitan and stuff. I think I owe a lot of story-telling kaya let me narrate na lang the events during our vacation.

First I felt sad that Judith wasn't able to go with us kasi naman medyo bad weather and the reason that we would like her to go in Davao is to show her the nice places there like the falls and samal. The problem lang naman kasi medyo ulan ng ulan kaya its impossible to visit those places without incurring injuries. Pag ulan kasi in Epol where the falls is, meron leeches and the soil is very slippery kasi medyo clay ang soil dun. Red soil kasi dun. In short if you climb the steep and slippery road baka d kana makauwi. This is also the reason why Val and I wasn't able to visit those places. The only place we visitted na nasa blog namin eh yung shrine and we went there just to pray sa moving Sto. Niño for a safe travel.

A lot of things happen during our vacation.

First, my mom goes to church every sunday na and I'm so happy about that kasi it's the greatest blessing we had in the family. I know that I'm not that religious here in Manila but God knows my heart.

Second, I live with my family again. Ate Chied went home with her new baby girl Chiean and of course her husband Joseph. My Ate Donna is still living there with her baby Jelia. My mom as always ayan pa rin with Tito Billy. My grandma Lola Lucidia stayed at home kasi uwi ako eh. Usually kasi my lola stays in Ecoland with Tita Myrna kasi nandun lahat ng mga oldies naglalaro sila ng mahjong. Joy our helper is still there kaya lang si Aiza eh umalis na kasi magschool daw. Joy as usual marami pa rin boylets.

Third, I met my friends. Friends from elmentary: Jimma, Divine and Kristine. We met at NCCC mall and went to SM and ate sa Cats n Dogs. Friends in High School: Che2x, Wong, Jam and Aloha. We ate sa Venue compound in a nice restaurant that I forgot the name and nag KTV kami sa Cats n Dogs. Friends in College: Sienne and Wendy. We ate sa Harana and you know.. talk... talk.. I told them about my sentiments(secret namin yun. Last but not the least, my friends in Funland: Shiela, Lec2x, Chinni, Thony, RJ, Shane, Dorothy, and Dean. Naligo kami sa beach kahit gabi and umuulan... Medyo hindi maganda ang outing kasi nga ulan pero ok kasi nagkasama kami ulit...

Fourth, I saw my realtives.. some lang kasi I'm not very close sa kanila and ayoko makipag plastikan... hehehe

There you go.. I think that summarizes everything... The details.. Bukas na ha

2005-06-01T00:25:00.000+08:00

Lani Misalucha has made another history for the Filipinos. She is the first Asian performer to grace the covers of Showbiz - the largest circulated magazine in "The Entertainment Capital of the World."

Kudos to Ms. Lani Misalucha.. She never fails in making us proud to be a Filipino.. She deserves an applause for a wonderful achievement. I love you Ate Lani... More Power

2005-05-31T02:17:00.000+08:00

Going Home

What makes me happy going home?

1. I will see my family again... Yes... Everybody including the new baby of my sister
2. I can rest because I have no work.. and the best thing.. I can sleep in my bed once again.
3. The smell of the province, the food, and especially the fruits..(my guava and durian and pomelo and lanzones and pineapple and many more...)
4. Basta.. there's no place like home.. Its so thrilling to be back at your roots

What makes me Sad?

1. I can't sleep with my baby Val.. huhu.. anyway.. two weeks lang naman
2. I have to use my cellphone again.. kasi nga text ko baby ko
3. My friends in the floor.. lahat sila
4. wala na... hehehe if i missed something for sure maidagdag ko yan pag nasa Davao na ako

2005-05-27T21:02:00.000+08:00

AMAZING POLICY

When luck has turned its back on you, you have no choice but face the storm. We'll too bad that on my entire week I'm blessed with all the jinx in the world. My QA plummeted on my fourth week to 87% from a soaring high 96% as an average for the last three weeks. I can't help but sigh... I have given my best and sacrificed my AHT(which sky rocketed to 8 min) just to pitch on my poor customers. Damn... I should have prioritize my AHT afterall. It was a wrong decision to believe that people would even dare to consider the effort you have invested. How I wish they can read this entry.

Looking deeper...I just could not imagine how unethical our business practice could be. Just think of it.. your poor customer has just paid $150 to get his Domain Name back and he was not even properly informed about it because he did not receive any note from us. But of course we already sent one lousy scripted letter to his emailbox informing him that we already charged him the amount, however the poor customer called because he did not receive it(no doubt its lousy). And then the worst case is that he needs to wait for 24 hours to have the Domain Name work and if he did not call he would not even know that he needs to wait! See??? You paid $150 for getting the Domain back when other registrar charges for $80 only and you got a lousy response.(forgive me for the following words) NOW HERE WE ARE... COMPELLED TO UPSELL!!! THE HELL!!! ARE WE ALL SICK HERE???? IS THERE ANYONE THINKING??? BULLSHIT ME!!! Put yourself in that customers shoes and tell me that you will still buy any sales pitch with your current situation. If I were the poor man.. I won't even listen or I'll even yell when you start upselling! SHIT TO THIS DAMN PRACTICE!!!

I could not understand why these people are like this.. Do they have any heart at all??? I think your conscience will tell you that its too much. We took so much already and taking more is worst than being greedy. Our company has been in business for so long now. We charge higher than any company because we claim to be the best in the business but this rule that we have now greatly disappoints me. We are putting money on top of service. We should call ourselves salesmen than customer service representatives. I just could not take it anymore. A sales pitch is good but doing it in a situation like the one above... I DON'T KNOW WHAT KIND OF PEOPLE WE ARE TRYING TO BREED BUT FOR SURE I'M NOT GOING WITH THAT HERD!!!

2005-05-27T04:34:00.000+08:00

16th NUMBER ONE of Mariah Carey.. Yes!!! Mimi did it again.. I love you Mariah.. You always "make it happen".. Go girl... Fly like a Bird.. To all the fans.. we need two more number one so she will be in line with Elvis Presley and three more and she'll beat Beatles. Truly she deserves to be in line with the legends because she is a legend. I was hoping this will happen and it did! Like her song in the album "Mine Again".. MIMI.. The world is "yours" again. Thanks to the Lord and to all who bought the single!!!

Lets toast to the new number one... Open the Bacardi people...

By the way.. the plan for next single is out.. According to the write ups... The new single will be Shake it Off. Its a nice song and the lyrics has a good recall. I sing it often and I love it.. Hope that it will hit the Billboard too... That maybe too much to ask from God but I hope so...

2005-05-25T04:02:00.000+08:00

I got 84% on my QA.. my AHT is going to 9 minutes... and I lack 1 hour sleep... The hell is coming to earth and sure did knock on my door first!!! This is a bad hair day. I don't know what to do.. One thing for sure I just want to go home immediately..

Another thing.. I have to say this in bisaya.. Naay dili dapat nahitabo sa isa ka tao.. kani siya isa ka buotan nga tao nga duol sa tanan nga mga agent. Siya ang dapat matagaan ug award pero kay tungod ang pamalakad kay sip2x lang.. ang luoy nga babae wa intawon matagai ug dapat nga maiya.. I hate the politics that we currently have.. An organization needs superiors with crystal clear judgement.. Honestly, I fear that this place is not a room for growth.. Its a barren place for dirty politics!!! This needs to be changed!!!

You see??? HELL IS HERE

2005-05-24T04:12:00.000+08:00

MAY 23 is the birthday of my Lola & Lolo.. Sabay po ang birthday nila... I just called my sister yesterday para makausap ko ang Lola ko pero sabi umalis daw kasi tapos na pala yun handa.. Sunday nila celebrate para maka attend siguro yun mga kasama namin sa church... Hayyy.. I just makes me miss home more... By the way.. I want to thank the LORD for giving my grandparents long life and good health.. I hope and pray that He will continue to bless them..

Speaking of blessing.. My Ate Chied gave birth 3 days ago to a healthy baby girll.. Ayyy.. I miss home.. sana makita ko na ang new pamankin ko... I know God will bless my sister kasi mabait yun masyado... Siya nga pala.. I pray na sana gumaling na ang sakit ng baby ko.. kasi masama daw pakiramdam niya.. Sana nga gumaling na kasi umiinit ulo ko pag me sakit siya.. Naiinis ako.. Sorry love if naiinis ako.. I love you so much

2005-05-20T21:54:00.000+08:00

WARNING: THIS ENTRY CONTAINS DISTURBING THOUGHTS.. PLEASE THINK BEFORE YOU READ

Once A Prostitute

At a young age I have no choice but to deal with life. It was never easy but nothing is easy except for this one way ticket-DEATH! And that is a cowards escape not my escape. I don't really escape but I do hide-I hide in the open.

I grew up in a family that is different from how we usually define the word. The main characters are absent-absence in its very essence, either physically or spiritually. By the time I realized this, I was already caught up in the idea that the people around me.. those who are close to me are my family. And as my family I have to respect them and their opinion. I must please them because I need them more than they need me. In short, I have given them the right to build my persona and so was my idea of all the aspects of life.

I became a social prostitute and was very good at it-par excellence. I was subtle at pleasing people. I thought I was using them but just like any other prostitute, we are at a losing end. I fill their ego while I slowly lose mine. Until I reached the point that I have nothing more to give. I got tired-feeling so corrupted. This has to end. BANG!!!

Who am I??? And the answer kept coming... I can't take it.. I can't breathe.. Its not my voice.. It was the voice of my "family". Then my heart starts to race. It was so fast until.. BANG! BANG! BANG! I died... I was buried.. they all remembered that once there was a prostitute...

Now whenever I meet people... some would look at me and sigh in regret, some never recognizes me but theres still a few who would come close and hug the prostitute as if he was holy man...

2005-05-19T22:32:00.000+08:00

Right now I feel really sleepy.. kasi naman I watched Manchurian Candidate kanina sa bahay kaya medyo natagalan ako nakatulog. Star Wars is now showing pero hindi muna kami manunuod ng baby ko kasi gusto namin ulitin ang movie eh.. sa Saturday nalang pag rest day na namin.. hehehe.. I hope I will receive good calls today kasi kahapon medyo mataas AHT ko.. hayyy... God bless me na lang

Its really funny kasi kahit antok ako excited pa rin ako kasi nga we are counting days na lang for our vacation leave.. Atlast makakauwi na kami sa Dava!!! Yun lang talaga ang wish ko kasi I need a break.. My baby and I deserve a break!!! I hope time will run fast, kun pwede nga lang i-fastforward eh.. hehehe.. Anyway.. tagal ko d nakapagpost.. hope paguwi ko sa davao makapost ako to update people...

2005-05-16T21:57:00.000+08:00

Fate was always kind with us... To start.. we have the same job at the same company with the same supervisor and to top it all we have the same schedule of work. Today is our 31st Monthsary and I'm thankful that we are still together. We have been through a lot in this life and just being together is the greatest gift that I can have.

My baby is as sweeeet as ever... Siya ang nagpa scan ng pic namin and I'll be posting then from time to time. You know marami un with our friends in Davao. Kanina pala eh naging bitchy nanaman ako kasi nga inantok ako kaya yun nag walk out at umuwi. Pero naging patient ang baby ko kaya naayos naman lahat agad.

I'm very happy kasi nag lunch kami sa labas at nabusog ako masyado.. hehehe.. I love you somuch baby.. Its a long way to forever!!! muah muah

2005-04-27T22:12:00.000+08:00

Yesterday my baby made a-what i suppose as a-"False Claim". I usually tag it "the product of his creative thinking", in short DRAMA. Well that was I thought it was. Kasi naman he usually exaggerates things kahit na hindi naman malala.. To cut to the chase.. totoo nga.. me fever siya.. I felt bad because I disregarded him.

To compensate for my negligence, I tried my best to take care of him. Its an easy task you know.. watching round the clock to let him take his medicines on time. Now he feels better. I'm so glad.. Thank you LORD JESUS

2005-04-25T22:32:00.000+08:00

Mariah RULES!!!

Fianally after all the that has happened... SHE'S BACK.. with vengeance!!! Mimi is the Hot shot Debut on Billboard Top 200 Album and also in United World Chart. She is on top of the World!!! Go girl... I'm so happy for her. After all the trials, she deserve this reward.

About Me...

We'll, nothing much happened lately pero meron kaming place na navisit that I like. It's called Pier One. We went there twice, once with Jerro and another with Junville. The ambiance is nice and I enjoyed the company of my baby.. hehehe

At work..

The new sked was implemented yesterday kaya nagkaron kami ng rest on a Sunday. Sama namin si Junville. Medyo me problem pa ang Network Solutions kaya me queue pa po. huhuhu.. the calls are flooding!!! Nakakapagod na!!! The next rest day would be on Saturday and Sunday. Sana rest day na po...

2005-04-16T21:35:00.000+08:00

It's been 2 1/2 years now... Val and I are still together.. We have been through rough times but we got over it. We had a tsumani once and Val was stronger than anything at all.. I'm just so happy that I have a person who is as strong, determined, sweet, caring, and loving as Val. He may be very KULIT at times but I usually get over it... His love is so so so much larger than his kakulitan... I'm very happy

To my Love: I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!

NOTE: PLEASE VISIT THIS!!! VALANDPOY.BLOGSPOT.COM its out new website

2005-04-12T19:07:00.000+08:00

Finally its out and I GOT IT!!! Of course my baby gave it to me!!!

Track Listing

1. It's Like That

2. We Belong Together (The best!!!)

3. Shake it off

4. Mine Again

5. Say Something

6. Stay the Night

7. Get Your Number

8. One and Only

9. Circles

10. Your Girl

11. I Wish You Knew

12. To the Floor

13. Joy Ride

14. Fly Like a Bird (Very Good)

I have to listen pa sa iba kasi d ko pa narinig lahat.. I was half asleep when he gave it to me.. hehehe... I am very happy talaga.. AS INNNNNNN.... Thank you very much to the person who never fails to surprise me... Sweet diba? Alam niyo wala na kami pera pero di ko lam na nag save pala siya para surprise lang ako.. sweet noh? I will really remember this album!!!

I LOVE YOU SO MUCH BABY!!!! YOU ARE THE BEST!!! MUAH!!!

2005-04-11T19:15:00.000+08:00

Look at my favorite singer dancing like Beyonce. Di ba bongga? Alam ko from the time that she left Philippines that she will really be blessed by God. God was pleased when she decided to leave her career for her family. It is sad though na umalis na siya kung kelan ako dumating sa Manila. I never saw her perform live kasi naman when she went to Davao it was a bad timing. I had to take my exam and so I need to study. Other chances of meeting her naman.. eh wala ako pera to attend the concert. The only memory I had with her was the 30 meters glimpse I had when she went out from Marco Polo which is infront of Ateneo building.

Here is another picture taken when she was impersonating Celine Dion. How I wish I was there to witness the show. Well, ito na ata yung isa sa mga wish ko in my life. Ang swerte ni Lani noh? FYI she had a six month stint then na renew and contract at naging 9 months ito. Not only that, dati afternoon ang show niya ngayon me gabi na. It only proves that the show is getting better. I heard nga na Celine Dion graced the show. Wow that a feat!!! Sana si Oprah din.. hehehe

Infront of this picture are people applauding Ms. Lani Misalucha. Ito daw ang song na nakakakuha siya ng standing ovation palagi.. paki click nalang sa picture para lumaki.. makikita niyo yung song... sana marinig niyo rin.. hehehe wish ko lang

BTW: Dumating na ate ko from davao and shift bid na!!! hay...

2005-04-09T20:24:00.000+08:00

The Future

Planning ahead is such a difficult task kasi naman you can never tell the future. Ayoko mag plan pero just few hours ago nag usap kami ng baby ko. We talked about resigning from our job kasi nakakapagod na, if not for the compensation umuwi na ako. Hahay... I want a fulfilling job. Alam mo yun.. yung kahit mahirap eh you look forward to doing it. Aside from that.. i miss Davao. I do not know if going this June would suffice the hunger. Sana nga para d ako mag resign.

About our plan.. Well, we want a house.. kaya nga nandito kami nagwork para magkaron man kami ng bahay namin. I want na pag umuwi namin ni Val we have our own house. Yun lang.. kahit hindi mansion basta amin. Ok na sa akin ang meager income basta peaceful ang maganda ung work.. Sa work kasi namin ngayon I dont really feel its rewarding. In fact I feel like mababa ang sarili ko... bakit? here are some of the reasons:

1. Kelangan magpaalam ka for breaks and lunch na parang wala kang right to eat or atleast you suspend it until you find a sup.. One time they were all in a meeting and I have to wait... Alam mo un.. parang slave.. pero ok lang.. kelangan kumita

2. Kelangan wag kang mag over sa aftercall kasi flag ka nila agad.. mas ok pa na kausapin nalang ako kesa flag ng flag tapos d ka man lang tinatanong if ano nangyayari.. Palagi naman kasi aftercall if I have to send something to customers or me escalation.. The hell ang bagal ata ng siebel!

3. You have no say.. or if you have, no one will hear it. You are bound to follow the rules kahit ano man ito.. like "DONT BRING MOBLIE PHONE IN THE OFFICE"...THE HELL!!! If we want to steal informations of our customers matgal na ho and kahit na walang cellphone pd yan thru email or para walang trace pwede yan sa tissue na pd sunugin diba? HELLO???

4. You talk about the same topic the whole shift.

Whats keeping me here?

1. Some people on the flor..: Ms Katch, Ms Chat, Ms Trixie, nuon si Ms Clarissa(Sup na sa ibang acc) AND FRIENDS

2. SWELDO

To sum up.. If not for our goal to have a house just before we leave.. I will not stay!!! Its a sad reality pero I have to bear with it.

2005-04-03T19:29:00.000+08:00

THREE NOTABLE EVENTS

1. It's the birthday of one of my best friends. Ang gulo diba? hehehe.. well, lets just say that I keep more than one best friend and the best thing about it.. I treat them equally.. I love them equally... To our POOH and the "Bagsak na jud ko" pero 90+ and grade... let me say:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! Lets eat CARBY este the cake!!!

2. Our most loved Super Star Nora Aunor was caught in Los Angeles California possessing prohibited tawas este drugs... Along with it was a pipe in tagalog tubo.. She was suppose to fix the airports drainage.. joke lang.. well, ayaw ko man maniwala.. nahuli po siya with shabu

3. Last but the most important.. We may not be suddened by this event but we are all hoping that this will not happen. I am not a Catholic however I mourn the death of one of the greatest person in the world. He was a fighter for the poor and the voice of God. Many attempted to kill him but he never faltered until his mission is accomplished. To Pope John Paul II

"Tetelestai : It is finished!"

2005-04-02T23:43:00.000+08:00

Pre_employment Exam

I have been working at PeopleSupport for almost 6 months now but it was just 2 days ago that I had my PEE. I just love to procastinate. Good thing that my friend Car-b came from Dasvao. He will be working at KPMG an auditing firm where my other friend Yoyoy is working. Car-b needs to have PEE at Healthway which is also our Company Clinic so my baby(VAL) and I joined Car-b.

I was amazed to know that I have High-blood pressure! I could not believe it!!! Well my BP reached 140/80.huh? weird?&*$?? Actually, before I took the exam I got a very bad news that cause my heart to race like hell... I WILL BE INJECTED!!! OHHHH MYYYYY... I hate the idea..

Its a relief that after the CBC check my blood pressure went down to 127/70. Normal!! Thanks God

2005-03-31T01:25:00.000+08:00

Check this out

She's coming back! The voice is back with a vengeance... HAHAHA... listen to "We belong together" coz it rocks!!! I really love Mariah.. Watch OUT for her Album on April 12, 2005

2005-03-27T20:42:00.000+08:00

Cheer Up!i! Cheer Up!i! Cheer Up!i! Cheer Up!i! Cheer Up!i! Cheer Up!i!

Life is a bed of roses with thorns...hehehe So when you feel blue you have to consult a doctor because you might have infection. Just kidding but---- its a fact. Right? When life strikes we need someone to comfort us(a doctor). We need a friend, a shoulder to cry on(where we can sneeze), someone who'll listen or pretend to listen, a person who says they understand even if they have no clue, someone who has the confidence to say "it's ok" when they know that it's not... The bottom line is..... we need a witness. We just need someone who can attest that we exist--that we are important.

I just want to thank my better half... Thank you for being a witness.. For always being there even if I suck!!! Love... I love you so much!!! Happy Easter

2005-03-23T22:54:00.000+08:00

I'm In the mOod f0r dAncIng...

Yah right... I don't know.. I just feel good today even for the fact that I will be working tomorrow. Thanks God.. I hope this feeling won't go away... Just for fun I would like to post an email sent by my good friend Junville.. Enjoyyyy

ANG BAGONG DIKSYONARYO:

Mga Bagong Katungkulan (Translated Job Titles)
Siguro napapanahon ng palitan ang mga titulo ng mga
katungkulan, trabaho (job title), o "elected
positions" na dati nating nakasanayan.

Nakalista sa baba ay mga titulo ng mga posisyon sa
English at ang bagong nababagay na bansag sa kanila sa
wikang Pilipino:

President - Pasimuno
Vice President - Kunsintidor
Secretary - Palsipikador
Treasurer - Kubrador
Auditor - Kasabwat
Business Manager - Gastador
Public Relations Officer - Tsismoso
Sergeant-at-Arms - Pasaway
Representative - Pahamak
Observer - Usisero
Advocate - Taga-batikos
Spokesman - Bolero
Moderator - Taga-bulabog
Announcer - Manggugulat
Monitor - Taga-silip
Inspector - Taga-lapirot
Investigator - Mangangalkal
Enforcer - Tirador
Jail Warden - Sadista
Prosecutor - Tagapaglait
Judge - Pilato o Tigahugas-Kamay
Aide - Taga-istorbo
Assistant - Galamay
Adviser - Sulsol
Consultant - Manggagancho
Contractor - Estapador
Expert - Punong-Yabang
Technical Writer - Manlilinlang
Spin Doctor - Taga-himas
Headhunter - Taga-silat
Headshrinker - Basagulero
Director - Taga-udyok
Manager sa Stock Market - Taga-silip ng stock
Boss - Busabos
Supervisor ng Boss - Taga-salo ng galit
Chief Accountant - Punong-Gahaman
Sales Vendor - Pirata
Collector - Mangingikil
Custodian - Taga-ligpit
Dispatcher - Taga-dispatsa
Distributor - Taga-kalat
Delivery Man - Taga-iwan ng Gamit
Circulation Head - Taga-bilog ng Ulo
Purchaser - Palengkera
Receptionist - Palikera
Clerk Typist - Taga-parami ng Papel
Messenger - Tagatulak ng Papel
Janitor - Taga-limas
Plumber - Taga-tagas
Repairman - Mambubutingting
Gardener - Damuho
Utility Man - Inutil
Watchman - Istambay
Security Guard - Bantay-Salakay
Doorman - Nagpapalusot
Driver - Kaskasero
Chance Passenger - Malas na Nakikiangkas
Comedian - Alaskador
Entertainer - Kerengkeng

2005-03-20T19:59:00.000+08:00

I dont want to write.....

My life is mirror.. that's all I can say.. I'm just tired.. I don't have a rest day this week.. ahuh!!! Listen to this or sing as well...

Angel

Spend all your time waiting
For that second chance
For a break that would make it okay
There?s always one reason
To feel not good enough
And it?s hard at the end of the day
I need some distraction
Oh beautiful release
Memory seeps from my veins
Let me be empty
And weightless and maybe
I?ll find some peace tonight

In the arms of an angel
Fly away from here
From this dark cold hotel room
And the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage
Of your silent reverie
You?re in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort there

So tired of the straight line
And everywhere you turn
There?s vultures and thieves at your back
And the storm keeps on twisting
You keep on building the lie
That you make up for all that you lack
It don?t make no difference
Escaping one last time
It?s easier to believe in this sweet madness oh
This glorious sadness that brings me to my knees

In the arms of an angel
Fly away from here
From this dark cold hotel room
And the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage
Of your silent reverie
You?re in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort there
You?re in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort here

2005-03-12T03:48:00.001+08:00

Blue Print

Grow Old With You

Billy Idol (Speaking): Good afternoon everyone. We're flying at 26,000 feet, movingup to thirty thousand feet, and then we've got clear skiesall the way to Las Vegas, and right now we're bringin you some in-flightentertainment. One of our first-class passengers has written a songinspired by one of our coach passenger, and since we let our first-classpassengers do pretty much whatever they want, here he is.

Paulo (Singing): I wanna make you smile whenever you're sad

Carry you around when your arthritis is bad

All I wanna do is grow old with you

I'll miss you Kiss you

Give you my coat when you are cold

Need you Feed you Even let ya hold the remote control

So let me do the dishes in our kitchen sink

Put you to bed if you've had too much to drink

I could be the man who grows old with you I wanna grow old with you

This song, I dedicate to my one and only love: Val, I Love You So Much Love, I wanna grow old with you!!! You are my all baby

2005-02-24T01:25:00.000+08:00

Meeting New Friends

We've already met for quite sometime now but it was til last sunday and monday that I can truly say that we're really friends.

Mikee and Chad are my new friends. It all started in the net when we were looking for friends who could tour us around metro manila. First it was Chad then he introduced us to Mikee and so the story goes

Last Sunday we had a nice time bonding at Mikee's place in Novaliches. She live alone and she invited us to stay there for a couple of nights. I love her place.. It feels like home. I don't know exactly how I would describe my feeling but I'm sure on one thing.. I was happy and I felt relax.

To cut the long story short.. let me thank Mikee and Chad for letting us in their lives and I thank God for giving us new friends. Hope the realtionship will last forever...

2005-02-16T23:23:00.000+08:00

A Day In Your Life

It really feels good to be happy even when you're 30 minutes late at work. I don't know why I'm happy, I'm just happy. My face may not show the glow but deep inside my heart I can feel the joy-I can feel the contentment. I hope this feeling will never end...

Just after I took my lunch.. I feel very light. Thank you Lord for giving me the joy...

Atlast I feel peace!!! Thanks for the prayers.. I think my sister is praying for me and my lola too.. I can hear them pray...

2005-02-16T16:30:00.000+08:00

The Reasons to be Sad and Happy

SAD:
1. My rest day is over.. huhuhu.. back to work now!
2. I have an interview for the VIP thing that Val signed me up.
3. I don't have a very good stats today

HAPPY:
1. Ms. Katch will be staying "INDEFINITELY" I'll quote her on that!
2. I don't want to name names but a good friend and superior fought so I could take my break.
3. I'm still alive and God loves me.. Thank you Lord...
4. I got my salary
5. And of course, I Have My Baby!!! I Love You So Much Love

2005-02-12T03:08:00.000+08:00

IM VERY HAPPY!!!

Finally, my long awaited dream to have three days rest was granted. Thanks to my very good friend and fairy godfather Ronald Laylo(diba complete and in bold pa).. hehehe He really deserves the credit because he retracted his PTO and the best part.. he offered it to me... Thanks, gracias, tosha, basta SALAMAT sayo my friend.. I owe you one!!!

Here he is:

Now what will I do with my precious day? Too many to mention but let me set my priorities:
1. Sleeeeeeppppppp, a very long sleep (ayyy first pa lang ubos na)
2. Shopppinggggggg spree hehehe (lapit na b-day ni Val, my baby)
3. Go out with my friends.. I'll call Yoyoy maya
4. Clean the room.. redecorate our place(well para comfortable ako when my rest day comes.. sa sun mon na rest day ko)

Hayyyyy I'm just so happy...... Hallelujah Lord Jesus.. Thank you sa rest na ito..

And to the lady who approved my one day PTO Hanna ( i like your jacket) Thanks to you!!!

2005-02-10T21:52:00.000+08:00

Life's good?

The fear of being alone never sank into my system not until I saw Alfie. It's really enlightening... I'm afraid that later in my life I might be like him-ending up alone without peace of mind. Like he said "no good deed goes unpunished", you know what I mean. I'm not a bad person but I just don't want to die alone.. hehehe

I don't want to get old and wake up one morning realizing that my time will be over soon. I hate to be left behind. I don't want to live the rest of my life in regrets wishing and hoping I have done this or that. I'm afraid that I will be like Manong Boy.. The care taker of our boarding house.. He is alone and everytime I see him his eyes just tells me that there's so much in life that he missed...

This is my dilemma... I want to live a good life when I don't fully understand what's a good life is. In some point I define good as something that is not harmful to me in anyway- sounds selfish right? However, if you would try to analyze, you'll end up thinking that everything is good. There's just different degrees of goodness, like not too good, good, very good, or best. I don't want this to sound complicated but its simply because good is realative to a person. Now how can I make my life good in my point of view when I feel like I don't get contented at all. I always seek for more and I'm very vulnerable.

How wish some divine intervention will come my way and let me see the bright light...

But I know I have my baby with me always to grow old with. He's my life!!!

2005-02-10T05:27:00.000+08:00

THE song of the heart... the song that gave my day the chill.. hehehe... I do hope that its not just the beginning though.. it should not end too.. like mine.. it never did end..

Let The Love Begin

Look at us

Ain't it funnyIs it just beginner's luck

Maybe

Ooh, with just a touch

Two different people

From such different worlds apart

Has touched each other's hearts

Like candles in the dark

So if it's time for us

We've gotta take it

Take the chance

The chance to make it

[Chorus:]

Now

Let the love begin

Let the light come shining in

Who knows where the road will lead us now

Look at what we've found

Make this moment turn our hearts around

It may never come again

Let it endLet the love begin

Ooh..

Here we are

So close together

I can feel the fire start between us

Ooh...we've come this far

Too far to stop it now

If this is meant to be (it's meant to be)

A chance for you and me (for you and me)

We found our destiny

Now we're lookin' at a new forever

Make this dream come true together

[Rep Chorus:]

Here we are

So close togetherI can feel the fire start between us

Ooh...we've come this far

Too far to stop it now

If this is meant to be (it's meant to be)

A chance for you and me (for you and me)

We found our destiny

Now we're lookin' at a new forever

Make this dream come true together

[Chorus:]

Now

Let the love begin

Let the light come shining in

Who knows where the road will lead us now

Look at what we've found

Make this moment turn our hearts around

It may never come again (never come again)

Let it endLet the love begin

2005-01-29T05:22:00.000+08:00

TRAINING GALORE

Kani nga entry dapat way makasabot... Nalagot ko sa workforce kay wa ko tuguti nga mag ilis ug sked. Kalagot sa tanan jud! Magbuot diay sila kun dili ko mag OT. Sila bitaw d man sad ganahan magsige ug trabaho ba. Ang mas lain pa ani kay naa mi lakaw unya nila Teri kay muhawa na gud siya. Na letse ko sa WF. Well, Ms. Jean helped me and she talked with them but still they didn't allow me to change sked. Ang rason sa mga kangok kay naa daw mulakaw na 3 ka agent pag alas saiz. Wa sila malisang? Ako baya ning life noh. Buot sila kun dili ko gusto mag OT! Litsugas silang tanan... way mga klaro!!!!

On the brighter side of the day.. Ms Bel treat us. She bought a huge pizza for evrybody.. Yehey... THANKS TO MS BEL.. THE BEST But anyways, hope my body can take the hectic sked ahead of me... Goodluck to me

2005-01-26T22:26:00.000+08:00

Take A Bow
written by Babyface and Madonna

Take a bow, the night is over
This masquerade is getting older
Light are low, the curtains down
There's no one here
[There's no one here, there's no one in the crowd]
Say your lines but do you feel them
Do you mean what you say when there's no one around [no one around]
Watching you, watching me, one lonely star
[One lonely star you don't know who you are]

Chorus:
I've always been in love with you [always with you]
I guess you've always known it's true [you know it's true]
You took my love for granted, why oh why
The show is over, say good-bye

Say good-bye [bye bye], say good-bye

Make them laugh, it comes so easy
When you get to the part
Where you're breaking my heart [breaking my heart]
Hide behind your smile, all the world loves a clown
[Just make 'em smile the whole world loves a clown]
Wish you well, I cannot stay
You deserve an award for the role that you played [role that you played
No more masquerade, you're one lonely star
[One lonely star and you don't know who you are]

(chorus, repeat)

Say good-bye [bye bye], say good-bye

All the world is a stage [world is a stage]
And everyone has their part [has their part]
But how was I to know which way the story'd go
How was I to know you'd break
[You'd break, you'd break, you'd break]
You'd break my heart
I've always been in love with you
[I've always been in love with you]
Guess you've always known
You took my love for granted, why oh why
The show is over, say good-bye

(chorus)

Say good-bye [bye bye], say good-byeSay good-bye

I really love this song...I don't know... I just love it... I LOVE YOU MADONNA... MUAH

Oh by the way, I watch ELEKTRA early today... it's not as disgusting as what the critics describes it. I admit though that the script was shallow but the effects saved it. I would rate it B. I still recommend you watch it